This Poem's Ridiculously Long
I beg of you dear reader, stop
right now! Do not continue!
for if you do, then you must read
this poem from start to fin.
Stop right now while you still have
the chance to not continue.
And if you say "Challenged accep-
ted" then you have a sin!
You still can stop
and should not read
this in a rhythmic song!
For if you do
you will not stop.
This poem's ridiculously long!
I want to sing
to dance
to breathe
to feel
to yell
to scream.
To move
to laugh
to watch
to do
to judge
and then
redeem.
And if you think you found the poem's
end, you must be wrong!
It's a fraud! A scam! A lie! Bamboozled!
This poem's ridiculously long!
You cannot stop, you are intrigued
and thus you will continue.
And read this poem until it stops
that which it cannot do!
So sit
and think
and read
and weep
and laugh
and yell
a song.
For this poem
continues on-
it's ridiculously long!
With no content
I need not fear
of ever running out
So you will not find any end.
You might as well as pout.
Not to be taken lightheartedly,
because it's not so long.
AH-HAH! I lied, I told a lie!
This poem's ridiculously long!
With only a pattern and rhyme
you think I'd finally run out.
but that's a lie because I'll break
the rhyme, but not the song!
Ha,
I
lied
again
because
I'm
obviously
not
following
the
rhyme
or
the
rhythm,
but this still counts as a poem because it uses literary devices that contribute to the meaning and overall message of this poem that will eventually be used to torture English students in a high school!
This is the end because I can't just seem to to find a gong!
I've been writing this for thirteen years!
THIS POEM'S RIDICULOUSLY LONG!
So enjoy it while it lasts, as all things must all come to pass.
Except this poem because I am certainly a bass!
And you thought I would tell the truth
and when this poem will end.
But that's impossible, as I'm a liar.
And this poem will never end.
Did
you
know
that
long
al-
so
means
a
cer-
tain
size
and
length?
And
so
when
I
say
this
is
long,
it
has
a
cer-
tain
strength!
Have you ever heard the one of the mocking's song?
Oh, yes! I remember that it has some very good bong-bongs!
The moon was glancing
down upon
the lowly, silent alley.
When who should
just come skippin long
But the great Kiddy Sally!
She skipped and sang and while she sang she heard a lowly moan.
A lonely man who spent his life living on a loan.
You see
he had
read this
poem
and his
last name
was Wong!
He said to little Kiddy Sally
"This poem's ridiculously long!"
"Not only that but it's pointless
and has no deep meaning
that could be used to torture English students in a High school setting. Did I mention that it broke out of rhyme and rhythm quiet frequently?"
Who asked his opinion?
Pipe down, small fry!
And then a flash mob broke out in a very sprightly dance.
And all of a sudden they turned in to dancing pants!
Kiddy Sally sighed a long sigh that sounding like a gong.
She commented on how this poem is ridiculously long!
And then the muse withdrew her hand and the poet stumbled.
"I will keep writing this long poem!" the lowly poet mumbled.
But the the police came and shut down his crime-type-thing.
And that only ended in the poet's more typing!
But who
could ask
for more
than this
a long poem
this is!
and now
im lazy
and will
stop
all spelling
and punct-
ua-
tion
and grammar for that instance
becuase i am almost done
with this long poem OH WAIT! This is too much fun!
To envision your long, drooping face
sighing exasperatedly!
Oh shoot! I did it again!
I broke the sweet melody!
But who would care but a long lost bride
who sailed the seven seas blue.
You are tired, and so am I.
I guess they're tired too.
But I can't end this long poem
until I'm sure that you have learned.
The lesson: if a poet warns you
Stop or your brain will be burned!
So have you learned?
Not yet I see you are no dunce!
Now it is time to put in
a whole lot of puns!
What did Aslan scream whilst in the golf touney?
Well that's an easy one for size, try "FORE NARNIA!"-ee
Still no cease from this long torment of punny phrases.
Say, did you by chance to chart to the moon's singular faces?
Now was that contradictory? I'd say it was wrong.
But how can I say that when this poem's ridiculously long?
I have more things to do than sit and write this thing.
But I cannot go until the old fat lady screams
Because a mouse ran across her while on the opera stage.
They caught the mouse, but let it free, and stuck HER in the cage!
Oh hark! you hear it now? The glorious melody?
This poem's done, you hear me? DONE!
And now I'm finally free!
SIKE!
I want to sing
to dance
to breathe
to feel
to yell
to scream.
To move
to laugh
to watch
to do
to judge
and then
redeem.
And if you think you found the poem's
end, you must be wrong!
It's a fraud! A scam! A lie! Bamboozled!
This poem's ridiculously long!
right now! Do not continue!
for if you do, then you must read
this poem from start to fin.
Stop right now while you still have
the chance to not continue.
And if you say "Challenged accep-
ted" then you have a sin!
You still can stop
and should not read
this in a rhythmic song!
For if you do
you will not stop.
This poem's ridiculously long!
I want to sing
to dance
to breathe
to feel
to yell
to scream.
To move
to laugh
to watch
to do
to judge
and then
redeem.
And if you think you found the poem's
end, you must be wrong!
It's a fraud! A scam! A lie! Bamboozled!
This poem's ridiculously long!
You cannot stop, you are intrigued
and thus you will continue.
And read this poem until it stops
that which it cannot do!
So sit
and think
and read
and weep
and laugh
and yell
a song.
For this poem
continues on-
it's ridiculously long!
With no content
I need not fear
of ever running out
So you will not find any end.
You might as well as pout.
Not to be taken lightheartedly,
because it's not so long.
AH-HAH! I lied, I told a lie!
This poem's ridiculously long!
With only a pattern and rhyme
you think I'd finally run out.
but that's a lie because I'll break
the rhyme, but not the song!
Ha,
I
lied
again
because
I'm
obviously
not
following
the
rhyme
or
the
rhythm,
but this still counts as a poem because it uses literary devices that contribute to the meaning and overall message of this poem that will eventually be used to torture English students in a high school!
This is the end because I can't just seem to to find a gong!
I've been writing this for thirteen years!
THIS POEM'S RIDICULOUSLY LONG!
So enjoy it while it lasts, as all things must all come to pass.
Except this poem because I am certainly a bass!
And you thought I would tell the truth
and when this poem will end.
But that's impossible, as I'm a liar.
And this poem will never end.
Did
you
know
that
long
al-
so
means
a
cer-
tain
size
and
length?
And
so
when
I
say
this
is
long,
it
has
a
cer-
tain
strength!
Have you ever heard the one of the mocking's song?
Oh, yes! I remember that it has some very good bong-bongs!
The moon was glancing
down upon
the lowly, silent alley.
When who should
just come skippin long
But the great Kiddy Sally!
She skipped and sang and while she sang she heard a lowly moan.
A lonely man who spent his life living on a loan.
You see
he had
read this
poem
and his
last name
was Wong!
He said to little Kiddy Sally
"This poem's ridiculously long!"
"Not only that but it's pointless
and has no deep meaning
that could be used to torture English students in a High school setting. Did I mention that it broke out of rhyme and rhythm quiet frequently?"
Who asked his opinion?
Pipe down, small fry!
And then a flash mob broke out in a very sprightly dance.
And all of a sudden they turned in to dancing pants!
Kiddy Sally sighed a long sigh that sounding like a gong.
She commented on how this poem is ridiculously long!
And then the muse withdrew her hand and the poet stumbled.
"I will keep writing this long poem!" the lowly poet mumbled.
But the the police came and shut down his crime-type-thing.
And that only ended in the poet's more typing!
But who
could ask
for more
than this
a long poem
this is!
and now
im lazy
and will
stop
all spelling
and punct-
ua-
tion
and grammar for that instance
becuase i am almost done
with this long poem OH WAIT! This is too much fun!
To envision your long, drooping face
sighing exasperatedly!
Oh shoot! I did it again!
I broke the sweet melody!
But who would care but a long lost bride
who sailed the seven seas blue.
You are tired, and so am I.
I guess they're tired too.
But I can't end this long poem
until I'm sure that you have learned.
The lesson: if a poet warns you
Stop or your brain will be burned!
So have you learned?
Not yet I see you are no dunce!
Now it is time to put in
a whole lot of puns!
What did Aslan scream whilst in the golf touney?
Well that's an easy one for size, try "FORE NARNIA!"-ee
Still no cease from this long torment of punny phrases.
Say, did you by chance to chart to the moon's singular faces?
Now was that contradictory? I'd say it was wrong.
But how can I say that when this poem's ridiculously long?
I have more things to do than sit and write this thing.
But I cannot go until the old fat lady screams
Because a mouse ran across her while on the opera stage.
They caught the mouse, but let it free, and stuck HER in the cage!
Oh hark! you hear it now? The glorious melody?
This poem's done, you hear me? DONE!
And now I'm finally free!
SIKE!
I want to sing
to dance
to breathe
to feel
to yell
to scream.
To move
to laugh
to watch
to do
to judge
and then
redeem.
And if you think you found the poem's
end, you must be wrong!
It's a fraud! A scam! A lie! Bamboozled!
This poem's ridiculously long!
8/7/12